CHAPTER VI (Up on the Cross) Excerpt Continued...

    Peace flooded my being. After a moment’s contemplation, something puzzled me. Finally I had to ask Him, “Why are You being crucified? I’m the one that deserves to die.”
I imagined His response. “I’m doing it for you. It doesn’t matter what you try to do, you’d never be able to erase your sin. I had to die in your place, so you could be forgiven. The ransom had to be paid by the shedding of My blood to bring you back Home to God. I’m dying for you.” Then He paused and added, “And for Quentin as well.” That shook me deep within... did I hear Him right?

    Quentin.

    “Him?” I asked in disbelief. “Of all the hardened sinners this world has to offer, how could You have any love for…” Something told me to stop. I was beginning to pick up that I shouldn’t criticize and judge the creatures of the Creator.

    In my dream Jesus seemed to say to me, “Child, I made you. And I made Quentin. How can I not love the people I have made? And who are you to judge others? God knows where Quentin is coming from, and what he has been through. Just because you’ve been given opportunities in your life that helped you, maybe he didn’t get those opportunities.” I could tell in His voice that He was gently but firmly rebuking me. Then His voice softened to a whisper, “And maybe these soldiers, hardened as they are, might just be the first to recognize and pronounce who I Am.” There was a weighty pause.

    After a moment’s silence, I thought He said, “This should cause you to be quite careful. My Father judges people not just based on their actions, but also based on how much ‘light’ they were given, and whether they made good use of that enlightenment. I know this is hard for you to understand now.”

    My dream continued, but I couldn’t make sense of all that was happening. It seemed so real, as dreams sometimes do. I could see myself on a cross and I heard myself say, “Why am I here? Why do I have to die like this … on a cross? My death will not save the world.”
Nothing. Just silence. Then I think I heard Him say, or maybe I was beginning to figure it out, “You’re here for the fellowship.”
“Fellowship?” I echoed. My voice was mingled with pain and fear. “You mean I have to die with You to keep You company?”
“Don’t you know by now?” He asked in my dream. Unlike me, He spoke calmly and quietly, but His voice seemed to resonate in my head. “It’s not really for My sake. It’s for your sake.”

    I didn’t say anything.

    “You need to be filled up with My Spirit, My love, and My character.”
“So, I’d be empty without You.”
“No, not exactly. Before My sacrifice you were full indeed. You were full of yourself, and full of the most destructive things of sin. Sin produces death. So, in fact, you were dying.”
“But, I am now too,” I thought hopelessly.
“Physically, yes. Spiritually, no. Before now you were dying two deaths. A rapid spiritual death, and a slow physical death. Sin produces death of the body as well. Now you are dying physically, but your spirit, or rather My Spirit in you, is just coming to life.”
“I see,” I said slowly, not sure if I really grasped it yet.

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